Sorts of Sports

Little LoLo's Lucky Pat's Panties

Editor's Note: Introducing Lo to the Sorts of Sports team.

As a girl, getting dressed for game day is always a challenge. Patriots’ sweatshirt? Brady jersey? Welker T-shirt? I swear, it’s harder than you think. However, amongst all the difficult Sunday morning decisions; where to watch or what to eat, there is one thing that always remains constant; I will be wearing my Lucky Pat’s Panties.

Lying dormant through the Spring and Summer months, my Lucky Pat’s Panties finally get to make their first appearance as the temperatures begin to drop and fantasy drafts commence. As I pull them from the back of my top drawer amongst the lace, silk, and pretty colors, I take a moment to reflect on their significance. They may not be the flashiest lingerie I own and certainly not the sexiest, but there’s something special about those little cotton smiling Patriot logos that makes me proud to be a Pat's fan.

Bought during my first football season as a Boston resident, these panties have stuck by me through 3 hard-hitting, long throwing, quick running, and hair growing, seasons. Each Fall, as I move them up to the forefront of my drawer to begin another long season, I am excited, realizing that with each new season brings new hope. Will this be the year Tommy earns his fourth ring? Will I actually get to be in New England when the Pats win the Superbowl? Will Belichick finally respond to all my e-mails asking him to hire me as his personal stylist for games or at least purchase a sweatshirt with some sleeves? The possibilities are endless and with my Lucky Pat’s Panties, anything is possible.

Every Sunday for the past 3 seasons, regardless of whom they’re playing, where I’m watching, who I’m with, what their record is, or even if it matches my outfit, you can bet I’m wearing my Lucky Pat’s Panties.

However, tonight, as I place them back into the depths my underwear drawer, ready to rest for the off-season I begin to think; “Are my Lucky Pat’s Panties really that lucky?” I’ve only had them for 3 seasons now, but the results are disappointing to say the least. 3 years, and no championships. 3 years and not even a shot a Superbowl ring. And this year, when I really thought they were working, we lose to a man who would rather be sniffing my socks? Pathetic. (and creepy)

So away they go, another season down the drain and next Sunday I’ll have to spend at least 20 minutes trying to decide which panties match my outfit best. And so I think, could it be time to retire my Lucky Pat’s Panties? Perhaps they’re really not as magical as I think they are. Perhaps next year I’ll try a thong instead